Napisal/a katarina, v torek, 20. maj 08

Ocena urednika:    Ocena uporabnikov:      (2 glasov)

I stare at the little things
That you wrote on my heart
And think of how inch by inch
You slowly crept into my heart.

The endless conversations
Our talks till 2 am.
It reminds me how I love you
And how I wish it didn't end.

But did I ever tell you
How much you meant to me
No, I thought that I would scare you
And you'd run away from me.

But look where thinkin got me
You still left anyway
I never got the chance to tell you...

That you were my night and day
You were the only thing I thought of
You got me through each day
I never meant to fall in love...

But it happened anyway.

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Komentarji uporabnikov (2)

Objavil/a isoncek, v 21-05-2008 13:28, 1. untitled Ritmično zanimiva pesmica, samo popravi malo rime: -(heart - heart, me-me, day -day???)  -v 2. kitici ni rime  -iz tretje kitice ti je ušel verz v četrto..    samo kratko opažanje...brez zamere    LP Kočijaž   Objavil/a Providence, v 21-05-2008 18:53, 2. untitled Se strinjam s predhodnico, dodala bi še:   how I wish it HADN'T ENDED (malo skazi rimo, ampak tako je prav, ker se JE KONČALO, želiš si, da se ne bi bilo končalo - en čas nazaj, tj. Past Perfect). Ne gre le za zadostitev slovnici - pomen je v primeru Past Simpla drugačen (želim si, da se ne konča), dejansko pa sploh ne gre, ker v Present Simplu ne bi rekla, da se vse končuje (temveč v Present Continuousu).  Priporočam še:  But look WHERE thinking got me.  Ok, kratka lekcija iz angleškega jezika končana.   Sama pesem mi je kar všeč; poleg tega sem skoraj do besede isto doživela sama. Menim pa, da bi se dalo malo bolj izpiljeno povedati, pa naj bo v tujem ali maternem jeziku.  P.